could you hold my hand?

I wanted to hold his hand - million times, but million times I was afraid he would let it go and laugh...

like every time we walk from school or every time we go to the grocery store...many times it'd save my life.
because you can't imagine how many times it had killed me. Holding on to my school bag, wishing I had no hands - and so I wouldn't have to fight with myself.

it would be simple, just take his hand on perfect day - and keep walking, keep talking, keep smiling like we do...
it would be simple, just take his hand on bad day - and keep walking, keep thinking, keep living lie we do...

and it would save my life many times. But I'm not brave enough. Not in a million years would I find a courage to reach for his hand. And really it would be nothing big - just two friends holding hands, but I couldn't do it if my life dependent on it. Because what he thinks matters more.

that's pathetic. Being scared of holding hand of my friend isn't it? - pathetic that I WANT it so much, pathetic that I can't do it.


by your side I walked
you smiled, I talked
each holding on
to our own worlds

but maybe one day...

by your side I'll walk
you'll smile, I'll talk
each holding on
to our own world
we'll share.